EFL Equipped for Life
Counselling, Coaching and Educating
Helping children become emotionally resilient adults
Suppressed emotions have a way of coming out sooner or later and this can result in young people looking for a way to numb their feelings. This can lead to unhealthy coping skills such as substance abuse and behavioural issues withdrawal as well as result in anxiety and depression.
Helping young children to express feelings in a healthy way can help them to be emotionally resilient adults and overcome life’s challenges constructively.
Let’s help next generation fathers and Mums to demonstrate their feelings and openly and become good problem solvers.
Don’t tell them to “stop crying, or crying isn’t going to help get over it you are a big boy/girl”
Crying in front of someone isn’t a Weakness. It is a strength that demonstrates that they feel secure Choosing to cry. It is also choosing not to care about the opinions of others.
-
Empower them
Tell them, I am so glad d you are not afraid to cry when your feelings are hurt. (you are acknowledging their emotionally secure while acknowledging their feelings)
2- Normalising and help express feelings.
Tell them it’s ok to cry and it is normal to cry, but also, it’s helpful to talk about thigs, that you are always happy to listen, because when we talk about things some of the stress or pain can go away, it also helps to see how we can stop it from happening or what we can do about it if it happens again.
Use the language they understand.
3- Build autonomy
If you don’t want to talk, I won’t force you, but it is good to think about what you might do next time.
4- Reflecting and planning ahead
Once they are calm ask them what do you think you could do next time?
Scientific research has shown reveal crying helps us feel better about pain. We tend to breathe deeper when crying and deep breathing reduces cortisol (the stress hormone) and lowers stress levels. So, having a good cry can help prevent from making hasty decisions.